The Answer Is 4...And An American

Wow, one of the scariest moments of my life happened last week. I wasn't even prepared, because Filipino people don't like to make plans. Things just happen, kind of spur of the moment. So, Khen called us to see if we were free, and 2 hours later we were headed up the mountain to the...

The zipline is at the top of the mountain, the same mountain that La Tegola is on. This time we got to look over the entire island in the daylight. The drive was beyond words. How can you describe the beauty of looking at miles upon miles of jungle clouded in mist? There are so many trees! I kept imagining gorillas and chimps swinging around in the canopy...Even though we don't have them here, because as I was informed, Filipinos shoot anything that moves.

When we parked a little boy, I refer to him as "the scary boy", informed us where we were allowed to drive, and directed us to a parking spot. He couldn't have been older than 7 and was in charge of his little brother, around the age of 2, while his family were busy at work running the zipline. We walked up a hill and I saw the cable that was meant to carry us over the jungle. It was about this point that I realized I'm afraid of death. And, even though I am most afraid of drowning, falling to my death from high above the jungle didn't sound like a real fun way to go.

Now, most of you should know that I'm not skinny. We'll go with full figured, it boosts my self-esteem far more than "fat" does. And, those cables may be able to hold up to 900 lbs, but that doesn't make you feel safe when you're probably the biggest chick they've strapped into a harness. Once we're all done getting our safety equipment on we climbed and climbed and climed up some rickety bamboo stairs. I made Todd promise that he'd go first, because I was ready to back out at that point. But when we were paird off, he and I went at the same time. The poor guy had to push me off the platform. My heart was pounding so loud I would've been able to hear it, had it not been for my screams. At one point I turned backwards, and I swore. when I finally looked down I just couldn't believe what I was seeing. It was one of the most beautiful things I've ever seen in my life!

We did this...

Over this...

We landed on the far platform and the first thing the man said to me was..."Wow, you very big, yes?" Well if that doesn't make you feel good, nothing will! I just laughed. We were then loaded into a kidnapper van and transported back to the beginning. There was a shorter zipline, and since the 2 combined cost us about $5 total, we went for it.

I don't know if they just used a different harness or what, but when I was trying to remove the harness, it was far more challenging. The men just laughed and watched my guy try to remove my harness. After several attempts they decided to help. 4 men later and my brother had to come help too. After one last tug and a several inch lowering in my pants I was out. So, one of the worlds questions has been answered. Equally as mind boggling as the tootsie pop question.

How many Filipino men does it take to get one full-figured American chick out of a harness? The anser is 4, and 1 American.

They scrub where?!

I've been excited about a massage, and once I was informed that you can get a massage and a full body scrub for less than $15 I was all sorts of excited. And even though I knew it was called a "body" scrub...I must say I wasn't quite anticipating the thoroughness.

Our friend Khen took us to this salon in Mango Square. And it's surrounded by creepy, dirty alleys just like the rest of the island. But, she said it was clean and that they do a good job...so we let her lead us. After our snack (see previous post) we returned to the salon. That's when Khen left us to follow the owner, pretty sure he's gay, outside. We followed him past a homeless man, a stray cat, piles of garbage and up a back staircase. About then is when we got nervous. But once inside, it was very peaceful. Soft music, dim lighting, and beautiful curtains. This seems like a much better idea now. We changed our shoes into some white slippers and then we were taken into our spa room. So, it too was beautiful. And we then found out that Michelle and I would be in the same room. And then we were instructed to, get naked, take a shower and lie on the table.

Once they left and our laughter subsided Michelle looked at me and said, "Well, when in Rome." And we did as instructed. As I sat my towel and last article of clothing aside, I saw something move out of the corner of my eye. I jumped and looked down just in time to see the mouse run across my foot. I don't know why they always scream in the movies, because I was more like hyperventilating! I grabbed my tail and ran back into the room with Michelle. She said that I should just go back in the shower and be fast. I checked behind the door and toilet to assure myself he had vacated the area (which really just meant that he was somewhere else in the room) and quickly showered. I continued to remind myself that it could've happened anywhere. I am living in a third world country after all.

Once we were showered and laying on our tables, bonding just as my mother suggested, our scrubbers returned. Those few minutes spent laughing while draped in a towel were over...They whipped those off immediately. And all I could do was giggle to myself and think of how none of this would ever happen at home! They scrubbed us with some awesome smelling vanilla and honey concoction. Now, let me put it this way...about a 4 inch area wasn't scrubbed. The rest of my body was returned to it's newborn smoothness. My junk in the trunk was no exception. Although I was forewarned, nothing really prepares you for a slip of the hand into the crack. So, after the back of me was coated, I was instructed to roll over, yeah...the girls got a good scrub too. And, there was some speaking in vasaya exchanged...I choose to believe they're just jealous of my curves. Once they were done we were told to shower again.

Michelle went first so I stood, completely naked outside the door holding my towel with 2 fingers so as not to get the scrub on it. That was fun. I continued to search for the hidden mouse. But we didn't see him again. After the shower, and that stuff is hard to get out of the crevices, by the way. I felt like that sandwich on the mustard commercial who hates the beach because he gets "sand in all his crevices". We were once again stripped of our towels and now coated in a green paste/mud concoction. They wrapped us up in a sheet and left us all egg-rolled-up for 15 minutes. Michelle and I spent this time finally making eye contact and discussing who in our family we would and who we wouldn't (Aubrey) be bringing to this fun stuff. We showered again and this stuff was even harder to remove from the whole body.

At this point we were allowed to "put on just panties" and that was a huge comfort. Then began the most relaxing and wonderful massage you can even imagine. They climbed on the tables and really worked those muscles. They worked all of our joints and even gave the old booty some attention. It was absolutely wonderful!

So, even though it was a bit unnerving and a little bit unexpected it was fabulous! I can't wait to go back! Michelle and I sure did bond...it's hard not to when you're naked for 3 hours. And the girls were great, you could tell it wasn't a big deal to them, which made it more comfortable for us.

To end of the exciting and relaxing afternoon, we crossed a big street. No crosswalks or lights needed over here. And rode a jeepney. The taxi's were all occupied. Michelle and I were the only white people on our packed jeepney. And I just started laughing. We were like the cream in a double stuffed oreo. It was great. It felt like I imagine the animls in the zoo feel like, being stared and pointed at all the time. We made it to the mall and took a taxi to the house. We had wonderful fish for dinner and went to sleep. What a day!!!

When In Rome

Well, I know it's been a long time since I posted...But I've been waiting for something awesome to share. Our days are pretty much the same during the week. Wake up early, go to school all day, come home, eat, do homework, play with the kids, and then we have some dinner. We have a cook now, so no more failed dinner attempts. This is an example...my first real fish! Sweet-n-Sour fish made with Lapu-Lapu. Yup that is the whole fish there, teeth and all. We eat it with rice of course, thus making it a meal instead of a snack. If you eat without rice, it's just a snack.






We went to Mango Square, which is another shopping mall, to get a full body scrub/massage. But we had to wait, so we went to a little restaurant and tried some new food. I tried crab for the first time and actually enjoyed it. I almost kept the claw from my "Crab Pincher" but then decided a picture would work just as well!



We had Shomai? Yeah, I couldn't read, let alone spell what I ate. It was a pork and carrot thing with a breading and you can dip it in either a spicy sauce or a sour sauce. I prefer the sour sauce, cuz it's vinegar based, and it's delicious. And those are the "Crab Pinchers". We also had some kind of bread thing stuffed with sausage, pork, mushrooms, and eggs. It was strange, but awesome. I believe it was called "Showpow". But who knows?

This is us with our awesome "snack". Our friend Khen ordered for us. It was awesome.

This is Halo-Halo, it means Mix-Mix. And it is a mix of strangeness. Upe (a Filipino fruit), ice cream, jello (called jelly here), shaved ice, cream, coconut, jack fruit (or any kind of fruit really), and this one had beans. Weird? Yes, but good.

We also went to a restaurant, way up in the mountains. This is where we learned about spider fighting. Elementary aged kids buy and sell spiders then they find the perfect stick and watch, make bets, and cheer on their spider. Our friends have repeatedly assured us that the spiders here are NOT poisonous. But I guess I'm still under Utah spider programming, and I believe they should all die. But we're going to soon host our own spider fight. I can't wait.

The restaurant is called "La Tegola" a outdoor Italian restaurant. It was delicious. But the food couldn't compete with the view. It sits on top of a mountain in the middle of the island. We looked out on the entire city, and ate to the sounds of the jungle. There were geckos crawling everywhere. And our Father in Heaven blessed us with a lightening storm over the ocean! The pictures will never be able to capture the beauty of that night.

My hair grows into a monster after every shower. And I can't even capture the dome of fuzz on my camera. So when I say it's big...You should just believe me. The only time it really looks good is right after I dry it, before the sweat and humidity get a swing at it!

Life is still rough at times, but greatly improved from those first few days, and even weeks. It's hard to believe that we've been here for a month! It seems like it's been forever. I am beginning to enjoy the culture, even the eyebrow raise that translates into "yes" is becoming part of my brain storage. I am learning new words...most of which I can't remember. And trying fabulous food I would never eat at home. I find myself becoming a better person, and a better American. I now know that I will miss this place when I do go home. But that is a bridge I will cross when I come to it. And it's a bridge paved in gratitude.

No worries, I'll post about my scrub and massage experience very soon...the mouse running across my foot in the shower in the spa is where the new motto "when in rome" was first uttered, by Michelle. And, just to keep you in suspense, I'll be posting about my near death flight across the jungle too!

No Matter Where

So, a few thoughts. #1, I will never complain about being cold, the snow, the ice, or the long winter ever again. #2, I now know what the word minority means. #3, If prisons were built out of Durian Fruit no one would commit a crime. And #4, the Church is true, and our Father's love is tangible and real, no matter where you are.

After a long and somewhat death defying trip into town today Michelle and I were just chilling on the chouch, looking at the world of facebook, cuz it's our biggest connection to home, when I happened to glance out the window and saw the missionaries walking down the street. Michelle opened the door and we invited them in. It's hot here...In case you didn't know...so we turned the air on for them and offered them some water. Michelle asked if they were hungry. Now, in the Filipino culture you have to offer them food about 3 times so that they know you really do want to feed them. Very different from at home, where we feed missionaries every chance we can, and they know we want them to eat. But this is a third world country and not everyone has food to share. They are a very gracious people though, and still offer, but it is polite to say no the first 2 or 3 times before accepting. Anyway, we pulled out our staple food these days and had them make a PB&J.

We chatted a bit and talked about single's wards back at home, another thing we have in Utah that they have never heard of over here. Anyway, the Elders were around telling the inactive members about the rebroadcast of Conference next weekend, and decided to come visit us as well. Elder Landingin (No, I can't spell anything over here, but we'll pretend that's right) asked if they could share a message with us. The other Elder, who's name i can't remember, offered an opening prayer. And in his prayer he asked that we would be able to understand each other. Language is a huge challenge over here.

Elder Landingin said that during the prayer he had a scripture come to mind, and it was Mosiah 2:41. It is part of King Benjamin's speech, it speaks of keeping the commandments. That in doing so we will have true happiness. And that we need to focus on the spiritual side of things, and the commandments, all of our temporal needs will be taken care of. Michelle and I were both amazed at the inspiration.

For me, it made me smile and tear up a bit, because that was the theme for my YSA stake last year. The magnet is probably still on the fridge at home. It was perfect for me to hear, it was a testimony to me that this may be a whole other world, but the Church is just as true here as it is in Utah. I felt the Spirit stronger than I have since I stepped on the plane and left everything behind. Elder Landingin said in closing, that he wanted us to know that we are welcome in the Philippines, and that we are all brothers and sisters. I feel so loved, and that my Father is still aware of me. How beautiful to know that while everything else in my life is unfamiliar, the Gospel and the Spirit are exactly the same. I know that I belong to the only true church. And with that knowledge, even though things may be hard and this life can hurt, I can do anything.

And So It Begins...

Well, I’m here in Cebu. I can’t even begin to tell you how strange it is to be in another country. But, I think I’m starting to get used to being away from home, family, friends, and everything familiar, At least I pray that I am. We didn’t have the internet for about 3 days, and I know that doesn’t seem like a long time, but it was quite possibly the longest 3 days of my life. But, enough of the depressing stuff…here’s the story.
We flew out on Thursday, the 23 of September 2010. That Monday Michelle’s dad and Keven Todd were able to give us blessings, of comfort, and protection. They were beautiful I hear. I was only able to stay for mine, seeing as how the girls from work had planned a goodbye dinner for me that night. My blessing spoke of the 2 things I needed to hear more than anything else; that I’m making the right decision, and have known that from early on. And that my mom and Mandy would be watched over while we are gone. Also, that I will be able to become a beacon to the saints and the people over there. That statement gave me goose bumps, because my mom said the exact same thing to me a couple weeks previous to that beautiful blessing. The rest of my blessing spoke of missionary work, and that I am going to be able to help to spread the Gospel. How awesome is that?! But, it also is exciting! And, the knowledge that my Father in Heaven wants me to be here is the greatest comfort I have received this past week.
So, we left the beautiful Cache Valley at 3:00ish on Thursday…After we weighed all of the luggage, all 10 pieces. Mine was 17 lbs over and I therefore had to go through my stuff and leave things behind. I put my extra towels, soap, toothpaste, blow dryer, straws, shoes, and other random things (like my bopit I intended to introduce to the Asians) into a box to await my return. Sad stuff!
Next we met for dinner in Layton, with Michelle’s family and my Aunt Terry. Once we reached the airport we had to check all 10 large suitcases. Sitation #1…The scale we used at home was off. Solution #1…Go through almost every suitcase and take out the nonessentials to be shipped off at a later date. Way too many tears, not enough hugs, and one giant prayer circle later we were off to security. My wonderful family waited outside the security ribbons for one final wave. We made it to our gate about 20 minutes before takeoff. Situation #2…As the airplane began to taxi away from the building, the auxiliary power cut off. The pilot assured us that we didn’t really need that power to fly, that it was just for the taxi process. Solution #2… That’s awesome, and I’m sure you believe that, however, from where I was sitting, I couldn’t help but laugh at the situation. What a way to start a transpacific flight! The complications with the power delayed us and we don’t know the LAX airport, but we made it to our gate in just enough time to buy some drinks and board.
Once we were on the plane I heard my first word from a Filipino, Ma Buhy. It means welcome. And we heard it a lot on the rest of our trip. Now, our original seats were not together. There were 2 seats and 3 seats together. Normally that’s great, but unfortunately, we had 2 small children with us, and that’s not an ideal situation. Thankfully the airline moved us to the back of the plane where there was extra room for all of us. Awesome! Situation #3…our 17 hour flight took place on an old airplane, with no TVs. Solution #3…Drug the children with Benadryl so that they will sleep for 8 hours. And then we just got to put on the headphones and watch the small screen 10 rows up and pretend you speak Filipino. They fed us dinner once we leveled out. It was some rice with some form of chicken, a roll, CHOCOLATE PUDDING, and some noodle awesomeness. I didn’t know what most of it was, but you better believe I ate it all. When everyone is asleep, they walk around and hand our water, and some peanuts. A few hours later they hand out cookies and a nasty sandwich…for real, I couldn’t even choke it down, I shoved it in an empty cup and waited until morning to throw it away. (Pointer…Don’t drink a lot unless you are super skinny. Cuz the bathrooms are so small on those big planes that you can barely find room to pull down your pants. And DO NOT drop any change on the floor, because you’ll have to leave the lavatory to retrieve it.) Now, in case you are wondering why I know all of this I’ll end your confusion. It’s because I am a snorer and was afraid to disturb the whole plane so I didn’t sleep till Michelle was awake and could tell me if I needed to wake up. They served a fake omelet, sausage of some meat variety, and a muffin for breakfast. Then they pass around hot towels, which pretty much rocked my world.
We left the plane in Manila and I kid you not, my hair instantly started to frizz! It was massive…and we were only in the terminal! THE PHILIPPINES ARE SO FREAKING HOT!!! And yes, it’s instant heat/humidity! We must have been quite a spectacle because everyone stared at us, and brought little kids to get a closer look, much like you would at the gorilla window in the zoo. Kaitlyn and Brycen just turned around and waved. They got their hair touched by just about everyone. Strange custom…When you go through security you separate into genders, and are patted down (My first foreign touching). Our next flight went by without a hitch, and I caught my first glimpse of our new island as we landed. A quick trip through customs and we were on our way. Keven Todd’s coworkers picked us up, we loaded all of our luggage into one van, and the people into a second and drove from Maktan island to Cebu island. We unloaded our suitcases, realized we had nothing, including water, fans, or any idea of where to buy food. But Rishee and Marvin came to our rescue. Though it seemed to be a whole other day, it was only a few hours before we were back in our condo, and asleep.
We weren’t able to find church the next day, the number we were given in Utah was non existent. But after a week of waiting for things to get fixed around the house, and attempting to cook in this country, things are starting to settle down. It’s still just as hot, but it’s not too bad in front of the fan. And I'm starting to taste the food I've heard so much about! Like "Lechon" and "Hanging Rice" (it's rice cooked in intricatly folded coconut leaves) which was amazing! I think this is going to be some sort of awesome…though I’m not really sure what kind. Contrary to my first week freak outs…and tears…I am excited to start this chapter of my life. I have no idea what is going to happen, even from day to day, but have no fear…I’ll keep you posted.